Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – Paul
HOH Nominated – Bridgette, Da’vonne
Veto Winner – Paulie
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany #5 Frank
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Return Ticket Holder – TBD
Have-Nots – Corey, Paulie, Zakiyah
Have-Not Supplement – Trail Mix and Marshmallows

August 2nd was like Groundhog Day in the Big Brother house/beauty parlor. There was the usual smug Paulie action, Paul pontificated on several points, drama revolved around Michelle, and Natalie stayed cute. There was a major game mistake when James let info slip to Day – oops. So, now she’s got a whiff of what’s going on behind her back and murmurs her worries to Michelle (and us). Truth is that Michelle continually sits in the middle of the trouble that’s brewing. For that, we honor you, Michelle.Keep at it. Whisper it up, girl.

For example, Michelle sits in the middle of a Paulie/Zakiyah dispute that’s half romantic entanglement about trust and game play. The other half, the REAL half in our opinion, involves Zakiyah telling Paulie she feels that he’s cold to her. Paulie responds as per usual, “I’m being logical and talking to you like you’re a grownup,” cold and smug. What can she do with this? Zakiyah has developed feelings for Paulie and she’s now realizing (too late) they aren’t a great match. But she’s stuck in the house and paired up in the game with him, etc. We just hope Z doesn’t give up on the game because of her feelings. He’s just a guy, Zak. Let him go. Like Natalie and that whole movie, Frozen say. You’re gorgeous and cool. Focus on the game as much as you can. Hopefully he’ll be out of the house soon. In fact, it would be a beautiful thing if Z was somehow the one to get Paulie out of BB18. Stranger and less likely things have happened in the past.

The best part of the August 2nd is when Natalie sits in HOH with Paul, Paulie, and Zakiyah. They joke around to the max and it’s hilarious as Natalie insists that Bronte’s a mathematician who “does math all the time, like all day long,” and Paul says it obviously isn’t enough because she lost the math competition. Natalie then jokes about how she’s going to win HOH next and put Paul and Paulie up on the block for how much they make fun of her and her friends. Everybody’s laughing in HOH but we’re also laughing at home. In our case it’s because we hope it actually happens. In their case they’re just having fun. It’s kind of a perfect world, this dichotomy. Thanks, Natalie! Nobody knows (but us) that Natalie has the whole frigging thing figured out too. At one point on August 2nd she says to James, “You guys are running the house. Paulie, Paul, you and Corey. This is what happens every season,” see? The girl’s got it! She knows. Now just please let the next HOH comp be dancin and prancin all fancy-like with pom poms so Nat can flip this damn house on its ass.

There was lots of beauty parlor time on August 2nd too. It really did feel like Groundhog Day! Houseguests wore eerie clear masks like this one on Michelle. Thing is that Michelle also senses something weird’s up in the house. Around one in the morning she and Day have a long talk and both are getting a clear picture of smug Paulie and pontificating Paul. They point out how the guys lie. For instance, they said they didn’t lock the HOH door when they definitely did. Also Paulie and Paul both act cold and smug around the house. Then they say other people are “acting funny and evasive” meanwhile they’re projecting. They’re the ones acting this way. These ladies aren’t fools. Da’vonne says she’s feeling funky vibes about the Thursday vote too. This whole conversation is like setting up the fans for some shit to fly around that damn house. We can’t wait.

The reason Day knows something is up for certain now (about the Thursday vote) is that James screwed up earlier on August 2nd. In the safari room, Corey, Nicole, and Paul are talking with James when Day walks in. They’d been talking about evicting Day this week. So, when she asks what they’re talking about the silence takes over the room like a shroud of terror. Then James breaks the quiet to say they were figuring out a plan in case there’s a double eviction this week. Day sits with them and asks, “OK, so, what’s the plan?” and then James really pounds the nail in the crowd’s coffin. He says they think they’ll “put B and V up side by side,” meaning Bridgette and Victor. So, real calm-like, Day points out that if Bridgette’s gone this week how can they put her up on the block? Oh, shit – busted. They try to scurry with claims of mis-speaking etc but the cat’s out of the bag. Day isn’t going to forget it, either. So, get to the popcorn store now, while there’s still time.

– Katherine Recap

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – Paul
HOH Nominated – Bridgette, Da’vonne
Veto Winner – Paulie
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany #5 Frank
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Return Ticket Holder – TBD
Have-Nots – Corey, Paulie, Zakiyah
Have-Not Supplement – Trail Mix and Marshmallows

August 1st brought lots of pranks, hijinx, talking to the camera, and beauty parlor to the Big Brother house. In the morning Paulie pulled himself off the bock in the Veto ceremony and then Paul put Da’vonne up in Paulie’s place. Paul had warned Day a bit about it, saying it might happen because others who haven’t been on the block yet “would freak out” but he thought Day could handle it with grace. After the ceremony Paul got irritated saying he “tried to make everyone happy,” and clearly everyone isn’t. Life lessons sometimes arise for houseguests out of Big Brother but we would have thought Paul learned ages ago he can’t make everybody happy. Then we remembered that he’s only twenty three years old. Oh yeah. Beards really do age a person. He talks to Nicole several times over the course of August 1st and in the process Nicole throws her dear friend, Michelle under the bus along with Zakiyah. It’s kind of lame because it seems that Nicole wants to play an all guys alliance game much like the one Christine played in Nicole’s last season (16). Bad news for Nic: Christine was the first one evicted from that “alliance” and it’s likely Nicole would be the same in her current scenario. We’d miss Nicole’s cute-as-a-bunny character if that happens and think she’d go farther with Michelle and Day by her side. They’d have stayed true to her, if it just hadn’t gotten so messy up in there…

Natalie begins the pranking trend of August 1st when she pranks the “Master of Pranks,” James. She freezez his crocs and then Victor tips James off to their secret location. This proceeds to the Master of Pranks wielding retribution pranks; including freezing Natalie’s favorite sneakers. She’s a sport about all of them and even declares him “the winner” many times. James wraps her makeup bag in a mile of saran and then makes a whole whoopdydoo that a new Care Package from America came for Natalie. She cheerfully re-opens her previous care package to find a methodically wrapped makeup bag (hers) inside a billion wrapped cocoons of plastic. Luckily, Natalie is an iconic delight no matter what and laughs it off along with James chasing her with shaving cream and baby powder later in the day.

He also gives her a rundown on “game rules by James” that covers, 1) Don’t talk game 2) Never say, “This just stays between us…” before telling someone something and the REAL rule… 3) Never betray James. The cutest couple in town also talk about how both get underestimated by the house because they’re more street smart than good at the game’s traditional competitive stuff. It’s true. Lots of times Big Brother players don’t recognize the value of these kind of skills and can’t see that other players even have them. Natalie and James are good examples of this. It takes street smarts, for example, to be easygoing and make jokes in stressful situations. The prankster couple are both pros at this. Nothing gets them down. We’re just happy they found each other. They keep the feeds fun to watch and the house happier.

Meanwhile Bridgette plays expert facialist with many houseguests, including Paul, Nicole, and Victor. It starts in the afternoon when she plucks Paul’s eyebrows then shifts into zit popping, mask-applying, and, ultimately, full blown facials. Every once in awhile a silent Day comes by to observe but say nearly nothing. Da’vonne watched Victor steaming his face over an orange pot of water on the stovetop and all she asks is how long he’s going to stand there steaming. She shows glorious restraint in commentary and facial expressions today. Even when Paul shovels piles of P&P poo into their conversation about why he put her on the block she just smiles and nods. It’s the calm before the storm.

Speaking of Day, she spoke to the camera several times including in the morning looking straight at us in the London room to say, ‘I’m stayin chill but somethin’ is up. I feel it,” and gets all of the feedsters juices flowing for what she may do next. She’s taking it slow right now, just observing and silently taking note of all the house dynamics. When Paul talks about Da’vonne with Nicole it’s noteworthy that the ONLY negative thing Paul says about her is that she tied to win the HOH competition. Since when is that a crime, Paul? Get over yourself. It’s every player for oneself in the house. He’s trying to rationalize putting her up because he didn’t want to. Players often do this to reinforce their game choices after the fact, especially when they’re actually fulfilling another player’s wishes rather than their own. Paul can’t see this now but maybe later… like how James later realized he should have owned his HOH. Maybe he can counteract it later. We hope.

Nice thing is, it’s not too late for Paul. He just needs Paulie out of the house. Unfortunately, he doesn’t know this. We’re hoping the realization happens soon but the way things are going it’s not likely. In other house news Victor is back on some shit lists again for his excessive eating and he’s remaining blissfully unaware he’s having the effect. They’re starting to mock his annoying, wall shaking, laughter and each have a growing list top-of-mind that details all the food Victor’s eaten that could be in their belly instead. These are all Big Brother brand seeds for an imminent trip to the nomination block. So, a great gift for us viewers would be a Victor HOH next after the (possibly imminent) double eviction. Let them deal with all his quirks along with a case of Puerto Rican Sensation brand HOHitis. Ouch! In the meantime, if you’d like to vote for the next Care Package it’s got cool contents – namely an opportunity to cancel out two eviction votes. Yikes! That really could change the game. Go to CBS.com to place your votes. You get 20 votes per day until the package is delivered. Happy voting!

Funniest Quote of August 1st:

Natalie: James when are you gonna let it go? Haven’t you seen the movie “Frozen”

– Katherine Recap

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – Paul
HOH Nominated – Bridgette, Paulie
Veto Winner – Paulie
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany #5 Frank
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Return Ticket Holder – TBD
Have-Nots – Corey, Paulie, Zakiyah
Have-Not Supplement – Trail Mix and Marshmallows

The TV show of July 31st opens with the HOH competition and Natalie’s positive energy bounces off the balls as she and all the houseguests roll balls down curvy creeks over and over. Paul wins early on and there’s a side conference between Paulie and Bridgette. She says Frank advised her to work with him and Paulie says he’s “got her” which feels surprising but pans out in a tiny way later. Paul asks everyone to please volunteer and  be a pawn to go up next to “homegirl” Bridgette. Victor immediately says no no no no because he was already out of the house and (he doesn’t say this part but…) it’s SO stupid to volunteer to be a pawn. Paul thinks he can maybe talk him into it later. But it’s a hopeless endeavor.

Nicole and Day have post HOH awkwardness and it’s upsetting to Nicole whereas Day’s just like “I knew it”. about Nicole being untrustworthy Meanwhile at the same time in the very next room Paulie slams Da’vonne and says she needs to go asap. Uh oh. James tells us in the Diary Room right after that he would rather keep Day and get rid of Bridgette, which is what Paul also seems to want… Unfortunately, Paul then says the opposite in the DR then and it turns out he’s fine with Da’vonne going. That ‘uh oh’ now turns into an ‘oh no’ from us here at Fetchland. The show will be much less exciting without our favorite shit stirrer and facial expression maestro. Then during Paul’s HOH room letter from home everyone gets real tender and sentimental, even crying. Zakiyah especially really wants to hear from her mother as a result. Thus we finally see a Diary Room of her – as rare a sighting in Big Brother 18 as Paulie without Paul.

Speaking of which, the July 31st TV show introduces how Paul and Paulie call their teamup P&P; without realizing they’re just saying “Pee Pee”. Cool, guys. Real rad bromance nickname. The TV show does a whole segment on the twinsies and really make it seem like Paulie’s up Paul’s butt which makes sense because he did copy Paul’s look and all his little sayings. It’s undeniable but also just exterior stuff that’s not really consequential to the game. The real meaty stuff shows through houseguest actions and game moves. Paul does Paulie’s bidding and, even though he’d really rather not see Da’vonne go, is going along with Paulie’s strategy as if his twinsie is the one in charge. He’s the HOH!

After this we get to watch the care package announcement and delivery. Natalie’s adorably happy to get the Never-Not pass, especially this week when she was supposed to be a Have-Not for her low number on the HOH competition. Next Nicole starts “nervousing” about being put on the block so Paulie says he’ll do it. Then Paul does this whole “P&P rules the day!” thing about how they can control everything from these positions of HOH and pawn. Yawn. Yeah, we know. It’s great for them, of course, but makes for a boring game to watch. One sure way to inject entertainment into our feeds would be a feisty Day. Here’s hoping.

At last on the TV show we have the nomination ceremony when Paul puts up Bridgette and Paulie for eviction. Bridgette says she feels like the whole house is against her… and that makes sense since they are all against her in some ways. But Michelle does make peace with her on the night of July 31st feeds, which was truly a pleasure to see. Michelle admitted that she was just acting like a jealous girlfriend about Frank but she’s over it now and apologized. Kudos to Michelle for the self reflection and contrition. We’re big fans of personal growth. At the same time, we also love a good beatdown here at Fetchland.com. So, let’s see some action between Day and the house as they flip against her and she fights back. It might just be an entertaining week after all. Stay tuned here on Fetchland for daly feeds info and check out our tweets @RuiningBB18.

– Katherine Recap

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – Paul
HOH Nominated – Bridgette, Paulie
Veto Winner – Paulie
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany #5 Frank
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Return Ticket Holder – TBD
Have-Nots – Corey, Paulie, Zakiyah
Have-Not Supplement – Trail Mix and Marshmallows

On July 30th Paulie wins Veto and now it looks like he wants to keep Bridgette to do his dirty work; namely back-dooring Da’vonne. He’ll take himself off the block when it’s time for the Veto ceremony to set the plan in place. Paulie tells Paul and Bridgette this plan. It remains unclear, though, if Paul will really nominate Day but if he does the feeds will certainly get more interesting. That’s especially the case if Da’vonne subsequently has the return ticket in her envelope.

In the meantime everybody’s plotting and scheming. James realizes over the course of several conversations (some he was even involved in) that he and Natalie are the bottom of the priority barrel. Perhaps Natalie was right and he should have owned his own HOH rather than just doing what the house (Paulie) wanted… Too late now, James! He talks about all this in the Paris room with Natalie after the Veto competition. Almost the entire time she’s working out and just happens to still be wearing the running gear the Veto players wore for competing.

In the afternoon the bros all hang out in the hot tub to cat-call and ballyhoo at the sky like wolves during a full moon. They make about as much sense too but it’s all in good fun, boys will be boys and all that. In the meantime, Da’vonne quietly flips the pages of her Bible on the outdoor couch nearby. Once in awhile she looks up from reading to peer at the soggy shrieking boyband across the fake grass. Da’vonne’s eyes seem to say that she knows they’re going to put her up on the block. But what Day’s going to do about it is anybody’s guess. The Internet rumor mill is aflutter with notions of a return ticket. They’re analyzing signs, making connections, and developing theories to support the idea that her envelope number (8) is definitely the one with the return ticket. It’ll be lots of fun is that’s true. But we’ll all have to wait to find out.

Natalie gets into some boyband hijinx too. She fills condoms with water and eventually dumps one right on Paulie’s head. Looks like it’s bitterly cold water too. A therapist would likely claim that there are few mistakes for human interaction in the game of life. People can say they “didn’t mean it! ooops!”… when they do something like drop a condom full of ice cold water on your head, but on some level they actually did. We’d like to co-sign this idea with a special amendment to say that maybe not IRL but it’s probably true in the game of Big Brother. So, thanks, Natalie!

Later in the evening Natalie and Michelle sit on the hot tub edge and share their deepest insecurities with Victor. It’s tough being on TV without all the workout resources they’re used to. They feel helpless and fat and ugly. They’re on TV. It sucks. Victor is a dreamboat and says all the right things. They are so beautiful. He understands that it does suck not to have the right workout stuff because he struggles with the same thing but they just gotta workout anyway. They have power in this situation and need to use it to make themselves feel better. It’s lovely to see him actually reaching them and making them feel better with a delicate blend of empathy and pep talk.

That’s why we’re giving Victor our featured image today. He’s truly the Puerto Rican Sensation of July 30th and we’re grateful to him for spreading some much-needed good vibes around the BB house. Check back to Fetchland.com soon for more information about the feeds and the Sunday night show along with our tweets via @RuiningBB18.

– Katherine Recap

There are two different experiences, both called “Big Brother”.

One is the television show Big Brother, as the CBS producers present it to broadcast tv audiences, three times per week. But the other is what is actually going on in the Big Brother house; the experience of the house guests, unfiltered — or at least less filtered — by television editors.

Fetchland presents Ruining Big Brother. It’s less “spoiling” Big Brother and more pulling back the curtain, to ruin our collective illusions about reality television. Enjoy! Or better yet, recoil in horror…

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – Paul
HOH Nominated – Bridgette, Paulie
Veto Winner – TBD
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany #5 Frank
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Return Ticket Holder – TBD
Have-Nots – Corey, Natalie, Paulie, Zakiyah

July 29th was a beautiful day in the Big Brother house because America’s care package was delivered. Bridgette and Paulie are on the block because she’s “goin home” and he’s got an indestructible bro type-thing happening. If these houseguests get their heads out of their buttholes they’ll vote him out but the signs aren’t pointing in that direction right now. We’re in a wait-and-see transitional stage until somebody with balls and a mind of her own gets HOH.

On the fun side, Natalie got the first care package from America! She’s super cute and grateful about it. At one point afterward she whispers to Zakiyah, “Do you think people will get mad?” meaning peeps in the house. It’s an insightful question, actually and terrifically accurate because they do get progressively more envious as the day proceeds. But at the time Zak just shrugs it off with, oh no, they’ll be happy for you, just like I am. Unfortunately, she couldn’t be more wrong.

Hamster wheels in the BB house DO indeed exist but they’re hidden in the recesses of the houseguests’ grey matter. Big Brother players aren’t even aware of it but their unconscious spin cycles are in overdrive, brains churning and emotions whirring. We know this because even the nicest people act like raging dickwads in the BB house and they don’t even seem to know they’re doing it or why. It’s not something we can really judge too harshly as outsiders. After all, these are human beings living out a social experiment as a game while the world watches. Humans can’t help themselves remains the overarching lesson of Big Brother. Lucky for us, we get entertainment with no consequences. And really, since they’re only famous for about fifteen minutes in the grand scheme of life, it’s of little consequence to the houseguests either. Other than that they had the one super rad summer living it up on national TV and probably double or triple their Twitter followers. It’s literally all fun and games with Big Brother. Let’s keep that in mind.

Still, yes, the shit-talking about Natalie amped up over the course of July 29th after she opened her care package and was super grateful and happy. Because Natalie maintains “a clean side of the street” lifestyle and doesn’t really do much of anything worthy of slamming, the houseguests attack her appearance. Of course, Natalie is a lovely sunflower in the way she looks too… so, they have to dig deep and say she’s got “fake tits,” a pretty low blow in our opinion. Why does it matter if they’re real or not? They’re spectacular either way. Just like Natalie herself. It’s her body and her business. Shut it, bros.

Then Paulie took us on a time-traveling journey with his comment about Natalie, carrying us back to the days of yore when women were “kept down” by men and everybody was just “happier”. You know, the fifties. At one point Paulie tells Paul Natalie should go up on the block, “especially after the way she acted with the care package. Like, dude, you need to humble your girl” talking about James.. He also said “everybody hates Natalie” which couldn’t be more off the mark. But the part that really sticks in our craw is the “humble your girl,” and if we had any emotions left in our jaded, fossilized old souls there might even be some anger up in here.

That’s why we’ve decided to share something we’ve been thinking about Paulie lately. He reminds us so much of Stinky Pete from Toy Story 2 these days. Cranky, bearded, full of opinions, and… stinky as fuck. Do you remember when Paulie was the sweet sexy one? That was before he was locked into a Japanese businessman’s display case to never get played with or appreciated, just like bitter old Stinky Pete. “Let him out!” we beg of you. Let our sweet, shaven Paulie out of the box.

– Katherine Recap

There are two different experiences, both called “Big Brother”.

One is the television show Big Brother, as the CBS producers present it to broadcast tv audiences, three times per week. But the other is what is actually going on in the Big Brother house; the experience of the house guests, unfiltered — or at least less filtered — by television editors.

Fetchland presents Ruining Big Brother. It’s less “spoiling” Big Brother and more pulling back the curtain, to ruin our collective illusions about reality television. Enjoy! Or better yet, recoil in horror…

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – Paul
HOH Nominated – TBD
Veto Winner – TBD
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany #5 Frank
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Return Ticket Holder – TBD
Have-Nots – Corey, Natalie, Paulie, Zakiyah

The live TV show of July 28th began as they always do on eviction night, pretending that the inevitable evictee isn’t leaving after all. This time they use Michelle’s fear of Bridgette coming after her as a motivation to flip the vote and keep Frank. But it doesn’t really take, as we know. They give it about thirty seconds to a minute of screentime, including that crying jag we saw of Michelle in the storage room. Sob sob sob, “but I’m a big fan, Frank…” sob sob.

Then the show quickly gets on track, turning to the topic of The Secret Room. We see the houseguests adventure as they chase the clues (mostly Paul) just like we saw on the feeds but with better camera angles this time. One cute thing we didn’t witness via feeds was Frank and Bridgette going into The Secret Room and celebrating together.

So, next Frank and Bridgette are together onscreen again but this time it’s sitting on the block, waiting to find out which one will leave the Big Brother house tonight. BB takes a brief interlude, after telling us the eviction vote is forthcoming, to check in with the buddy of each veteran from their previous season. It’s funny when Hayden (Nicole’s ex from season 16) says he wouldn’t recommend a showmance for anyone who wants to win Big Brother… “but hey, I’m all for doin’ what makes you happy,” Smoochin’ rocks, bro. It was also nice to see how freakin’ FINE Frank was with that long hair. Cutie pants alert.

When the show returns to the eviction ceremony Julie announces that The Secret Room tickets will expire after the one on the eviction of August 18th is opened onstage. This means if nobody gets the return ticket by then, that Secret Room return twist won’t happen at all this season. After this chilling declaration, the houseguests each vote to evict Frank who declares his disdain for all of them except Bridgette. Then he sits down with Julie and she tells Frank she’ll open his envelope in front of the whole house. So, the houseguests all sit on their couches in heart pounding anticipation for the grand opening. It turns out Frank’s envelope merely contains a one way ticket home. Julie then asks him about why the veterans didn’t stick together and he mentions feeling uneasy about Mama Day early on. Then Frank admits acting on this feeling about Da’vonne was likely his downfall and the reason he’s sitting out there with Julie on this fateful July 28th. Mama Day reiterates this EPIC FAIL in her goodbye message to him and even Frank has to laugh at the always funny and fearless Da’vonne.

The HOH competition that follows, “Perfect Shot” is a long one that mostly takes place off the feeds. Houseguests roll a ball up a winding narrow “creek” to land either in the perfect slot at the very end or one of the numbers (up to 22) before that ultimate last one. Julie also says that whomever ends the challenge with the lowest score will be Have-Nots for the week. The houseguests can practice with a yellow ball as long as they like but once they use their red ball, it’s their final shot. Whomever gets the perfect shot with their red ball first is the ultimate winner but truly, the winner could just have the red ball in a high number too.

Turns out this is what happens, nobody gets a perfect shot but Paul gets the highest number and is the new HOH for the week. He takes his seat next to Paulie on the HOH bed and they hold court together for the night. Of course, Bridgette is going up on the block but the houseguests scurry in a flurry to figure out who’s going up next to her. The prevailing refrain from Paulie/Paul is they want to put a strong competitor up next to her so that they can win the Veto and keep the ultimate control in Paulie/Paul’s hands. Can you say BORING? Yes.

There’s also a new way to influence the game from home. Each week America picks a houseguest to send a “care package” by voting online. The first care package is a “Never-Not Pass” that keeps the recipient from ever being a Have-Not again. One of the quirks to this deal is that once you give a houseguest a care package you can’t give them any upcoming ones, which may be cooler or simply have better perks. Each houseguest can only get one. So, you could think of the care package vote in a kind way, as a gift to save someone from the wretched Have-Not situation of cold showers, eating slop, and sleeping in bumper cars. Or you can think of it with villainy in mind and give it to someone so they can’t get a better one later; assuming the care packages get better. We think they probably will. The first care package winner will be announced Sunday night on the next TV episode. In the meantime we’ll be covering the feeds for you here on Fetchland.com and via twitter @RuiningBB18.

– Katherine Recap

There are two different experiences, both called “Big Brother”.

One is the television show Big Brother, as the CBS producers present it to broadcast tv audiences, three times per week. But the other is what is actually going on in the Big Brother house; the experience of the house guests, unfiltered — or at least less filtered — by television editors.

Fetchland presents Ruining Big Brother. It’s less “spoiling” Big Brother and more pulling back the curtain, to ruin our collective illusions about reality television. Enjoy! Or better yet, recoil in horror…

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – James
HOH Nominated – Frank and Bridgette
Veto Winner – Michelle
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Have-Nots – TBD – none yet

The July 27th Big Brother TV show served as a sweet refreshment after a bland two days of feeds. In fact, seeing Paulie’s opening credits hair really gave us a yearning for the days of yore… but new fun lies ahead and the Veto show reminds us that there’s still half a season left for BB18. It starts with James quoting Paulie by saying, “you can bounce checks in the Big Brother house” about putting Bridgette up even after he agreed not to. Still Bridgette and Frank feel understandably betrayed. He’s comforting and kind to sad Bridgette but also doesn’t really berate James, saying that “everybody lies in this game,” which is true.

There’s a funny jig in the storage room as Paul, Day, Nicole, and Zakiyah express their joy in an interpretive dance. Next Frank goes to James in HOH and says he’s not feeling too bad because he knew this was coming but “poor Bridgette”. Then he tries to lay some groundwork to get a different person (Mama Day) nominated if the Veto gets used this week. James tells us in Diary Room that Frank is wasting his time trying to “okey doke the okey doker,” which is pretty accurate and amusing.

Finally we get to see the Veto player selection. Of course, Frank and Bridgette will play with James and, out of the houseguest chip bag, they select Day, Nicole, and Michelle to play along with them. Paul vents a little about how Da’vonne or Michelle have to win because the house keeps confusing the name Paul with Pawn and putting him up for nomination. This is the beginning of Paul’s now blossoming trend of busybody business. Whatever, bro. You can demand somebody win a competition when that person is you and you’re playing in it. Period. It’s each houseguest for oneself in the Big Brother house.

The Veto comp is a fabulous rave party OETV competition and super cool. The players hear “dope” tracks about the competitions played thus far this summer and the objective is to match the track OETV describes with the discs hidden in colorful goop puddles. It’s a serious challenge with rope climbing, disc finding, and water slides. James admits right off that he threw the comp, although we know he moaned and groaned about going out first. Turns out that was just a tactic to score sympathy cuddle time with Nat. But, hey – who can blame him? During the second track Michelle takes a nosedive slam to the noggin and it looks like she has a major head injury because red paint from her hair streams down her face. A head trauma has never seemed this funny before and Michelle’s over it pronto. She then goes on to win the Veto, her first big competitive win this summer.

Afterward when Michelle and Frank talk she admits that she’s jealous of Bridgette and wanted to be Frank’s “ride-or-die” which we already knew but helps clear our perspective on why exactly Michelle holds such a powerful grudge against Bridgette. Then Paul gets angry every time Frank tries to campaign and he’s not part of the conversation. Mama Day does a fun Diary Room where she says it’s kind silly for Paul to keep sticking his head into Frank’s campaigning but she also likes it because it’s DRAMA. Da’vonne eggs Paul on just the tiniest bit and then he “throws down” on Frank in the kitchen but Frank doesn’t really fall into it. “I’m the one on the block!” he points out, undeniably. Paul then criticizes Frank for trying to get himself off the block; a hilarious hypocrisy, given the nature of the game. Also, isn’t this exactly Paul’s goal along with every other houseguest? How can he not see that his need to stick his nose in everything comes from precisely the same motivation Frank has?

Michelle ponders what she should do, or at least pretends to. So, they call a house meeting in HOH to discuss it. Paul starts the meeting off saying it’s to discuss the Veto. Frank pipes in immediately to say he wants the Veto used to take him off the block and Mama Day to go up, nominated in his place. Paulie says it’s all to “no avail” and sorry, Bro and It’s not gonna happen. Frank thanks him and Day for having backbones and telling him straight up. The meeting adjourns when Paulie pronounces it so then prances across the room on his high horse to leave.

Next The TV show reveals  the morning bathroom confrontation between Michelle and Bridgette. It’s edited pretty accurately to how the discussion really happened. Fairness reigns. Yes, Michelle really was that unreasonable. Then Michelle claims the Veto usage such a hard decision; it’s “the hardest she’s had to make thus far in the game”. Amusing because she never even really considered using the Veto and also hasn’t had to make any decisions of import thus far anyway. Michelle’s Veto speech points out her respect for James in making “a big game move” and for Frank since he campaigned for himself. Thus, she expressed her latent bitter feelings for Bridgette by omission. Speaking of neglecting to do things, Michelle also didn’t use the Veto. Big surprise. Bridgette re-confirms that she won’t campaign against Frank, her best friend in the house, and that this is really the worst cases scenario for her. We agree, Bridgette. You’re screwed. If only there were some secret power coming that might change the whole game and turn everything upside down in the Big Brother house…

– Katherine Recap

There are two different experiences, both called “Big Brother”.

One is the television show Big Brother, as the CBS producers present it to broadcast tv audiences, three times per week. But the other is what is actually going on in the Big Brother house; the experience of the house guests, unfiltered — or at least less filtered — by television editors.

Fetchland presents Ruining Big Brother. It’s less “spoiling” Big Brother and more pulling back the curtain, to ruin our collective illusions about reality television. Enjoy! Or better yet, recoil in horror…

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – James
HOH Nominated – Frank and Bridgette
Veto Winner – Michelle
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Have-Nots – TBD – none yet

July 26th brought bad blood to the Big Brother house, mostly seeping from the saucy concoction coming out of Paul’s mouth. He gives Bridgette quite a “talking to” in the backyard hammock at around three in the morning which upsets her and otherwise really has no point. Paulie isn’t currently HOH but he still seems to have HOHitis while Paul apparently acquired a similar illness strain from “cracking the code” and getting into The Secret Room first. He’s relentless in his constant tirades and they’re terminally lacking in substance. From his hour long soliloquy about his beard and tattoos to his brutal beatdown of the already-beaten Bridgette; the guy can’t stop yapping. It was particularly unsettling when Paul said he can’t wait for Frank to go so he can terrorize Bridgette. Yikes. We thought you hated bullies, Paul? What exactly do you think it means to prey on the lone outsider just for kicks?

Not much else happened in the house on July 26th but Paulie did start some pseudo-flip talk just to keep Frank entertained until he leaves on Thursday. Under Paulie’s benevolent tutelage, the houseguests are pretending to consider voting out Bridgette just to cool Frank’s campaigning jets. It’s funny how suddenly trying to stay in the house (the primary goal of Big Brother) is forbidden and nasty just because Frank’s the one doing it. But the game pretty much requires it and not campaigning doesn’t get you far either. Look what it’s doing for Bridgette! She just gets chastised and insulted for NOT campaigning. Still, it’s pretty admirable how upbeat she’s staying.

Frank spends most of his time explaining all of Quentin Tarantino’s movies to the wide-eyed Bridgette; line by line and from beginning to end. Sadly, this isn’t even the least interesting scene on the feeds at any given moment. The houseguests exercise, give each other funky hairstyles, and eat non-stop with occasional bouts of game-talk and ranting against either Bridgette or Frank.

Some interesting talking to the camera comes out of Mama Day’s realization (during the HOH endurance comp) that she can’t trust Nicole. Guess who’s next on the list after Frank and Bridgette now? Yes, sir. She tells us, looking right into the camera in the London room. It’s no surprise, given what Frank told her about Nicole running right to him with the info that Day wants him out. It’s all the evidence Da’vonne needs that Nicole’s presence no longer helps her game. The question is how will Day get Nicole’s jury vote after evicting her? That’s going to be tricky.

Another person who got the diss from Paul on July 26th was the innocent Victor, who’s just been chillin’ and joking around ever since he was the second one to crack The Secret Room code.Victor lets Nicole put him in cute little ponytails with bows and listens to Paul’s advice in the storage room. Basically, Paul tells him to back off, saying it’s because their previous affiliation got them into trouble before. But really, Paul’s just annoyed by Victor now and being petty. He’s too cool for his friends of yore, it seems. Even so, Victor’s managed to wiggle his way into a strong position in the house. Nobody’s targeting him quite yet even though he’s likely to win tons of competitions – they like to call his kind “A Beast” in the Big Brother house. Funny thing is that they’re all too obsessed with Frank and Bridgette to even notice this threat.

In other non-news type news, Natalie and James are still the cutest couple by far in the house. That’s mainly because Natalie stays so bright and bubbly no matter what happens. She takes no part in the negativity to the level that the others do and that’s probably why she can stay so chipper. We could all learn a thing or two from our pretty pink flower of a houseguest. She’s also paying close attention to the dynamics in the BB house and has been the only one we’ve heard call out Paulie a bit on his HOHitis. Natalie has her eyes wide open and she’s keeping herself in a solid position too. We have high hopes for her at this stage of the game. Just make the next HOH competition cheerleading in Spanish and everything will go perfectly fine in Fetchland’s opinion.

– Katherine Recap

There are two different experiences, both called “Big Brother”.

One is the television show Big Brother, as the CBS producers present it to broadcast tv audiences, three times per week. But the other is what is actually going on in the Big Brother house; the experience of the house guests, unfiltered — or at least less filtered — by television editors.

Fetchland presents Ruining Big Brother. It’s less “spoiling” Big Brother and more pulling back the curtain, to ruin our collective illusions about reality television. Enjoy! Or better yet, recoil in horror…

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – James
HOH Nominated – Frank and Bridgette
Veto Winner – Michelle
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Have-Nots – TBD – none yet

On the morning of July 25th the Veto ceremony commences along with a tense Bridgette and Michelle “confrontation type thing” in the bathroom.  The Veto ceremony happened behind the scenes but must have ruffled some feathers. Although the Bridgette/Michelle talk felt harmless; pretty much just Bridgette’s Disney princess version of putting Michelle “on blast,” it also seems to have an impact on Michelle. She spends the day muttering and wondering to herself while outwardly confronting others about some of the tidbits Bridgette told her in their morning chat. The biggest matter of concern to Michelle was a “reference to her appearance” – another houseguest’s joke told behind Michelle’s back. It turned out to be Paul calling her “Buzz Lightyear” in their contentious early BB days. He quickly admits that, yes, he’d said that about her. Then Paul explains about Mr. Lightyear with a deadpan face saying, “he’s a good lookin’ guy!”

But the real action starts around five in the evening when the houseguests are on indoor lockdown. Info pops onto the living room TV screen. It tells them, “Clues to the secret/Are all around you/You may want to keep it to yourself,” discovered first by James. Unfortunately, he calls out so others come look at the TV before the message gets to the third part about keeping it quiet. Much of the house is napping but the houseguests wake each other up with the social game in mind. After awhile half the houseguests are standing around thinking while Paul and the rest scurry back and forth between clues. Paul announces repeatedly that, he’s almost got it, guys! until eventually his magical mantra works and Paul gets into the secret room.

There was fun-filled tension in the middle of the secret room discovery when Paul was halfway there. He tries to get alone by the booth so he can get inside but can’t shake Frank from his tail feathers. Finally, Paul manages to get inside the booth alone. He dials the secret code he’d figured out from the clues and then a voice comes over the phone. “Congratulations!” it says, loudly enough for others around the booth to hear and then instructs Paul to come back when the coast is clear and he can enter the secret room then. So, after Paul hears this message he tries to keep Frank, and others, away from the phone booth yet again to allow him inside the secret room without detection. But, of course, nobody will let him be alone with the booth at this high-tension stage of the game. Some of them heard that message too, bro! So, eventually Paul grabs a free second and goes for it. Natalie, Corey, Mama Day, and James are all standing right there outside the booth as he’s tunneling into the secret room under a red-light. This climax happens a bit after five thirty PM.

Inside the room is decorated like a Paris picnic. Paul reads a script of explanation aloud that tells him there are twelve envelopes and he needs to choose one. Each envelope contains a ticket, one’s round trip and the rest are one way. Once chosen, each envelope can’t be opened until the houseguest is evicted. Upon eviction Julie will open it live onstage and if they have the the round trip ticket, it grants that houseguest entry back into the house. Each ticket also has an individual number. They can’t be traded or opened. If they open their envelope it’s void and if they tamper with another houseguest’s there may be a penalty.

Paul ponders what to tell the others for a bit in The Secret Room before he re-enters the house. They all congratulate him and Paul talks to them as a group in the living room, giving very little information and not really convincing them that he’s telling the whole story. Many of them speculate aloud that they too can get into The Secret Room to possibly score an envelope they can’t open. That was pretty much all Paul told them about the experience, he now has an envelope he can’t open. If Paul was a Big Brother fan, he certainly would’ve come up with a better “story” than this. Something to squash their hope of entering the room. Something final. Perhaps, “I got a mystery gift to open once I’m out of the house. There’s only one, though. Sorry guys!” and that would have the end of it for many of the less curious houseguests. Of course, Frank would’ve still investigated further as well as Day and James. But Nicole played quite a passive role in this whole enterprise, even with her veteran status.

In fact, she spent the rest of the day fuming that it was Victor who told her the secret code. Corey should’ve told her. What about figuring it out your damn self, Nicole! Geez Louise. Why should anyone else ever have to do your houseguest job for you? The answer is never, girlfriend. Play your own damn game. Speaking of Victor, he’s next to figure out the entry code and get into the room through the tunnel. Once Victor’s in, though, we lose the feeds until after the whole house has been inside The Secret Room and chosen their own ticket. In fact, the feeds came back on at six forty PM to show Michelle, the last houseguest to collect their envelope, reading the instructions and looking like a lost little puppy.

Michelle then holds a cranky ass grudge about being last to experience The Secret Room. She cries inconsolably and claims it’s about the Bridgette confrontation that morning. It seems more like she’s just emotional and doesn’t know why, even saying at several points, “I don’t even know why I’m crying,” but this sin’t even close to being the most clueless or overly emotional reaction to the events of July 25th. No, that award goes to Nicole. As we mentioned earlier, she got upset that Corey wasn’t the one to tell her the secret code. But we didn’t say that she went on and on about it for (literally) hours. That’s the things about a showmance, even if it only reaches flirt and cuddle proportions, because it’s on Big Brother, it’s bound to be a relationship on crack. Once they get out in the real world, a houseguest can get back to their chill, regular self, but while they’re in the house the neuroses is just too powerful. One thing is for certain, Big Brother brings out the crazy in even the coolest people. That’s why it’s so entertaining!

So, although Michelle didn’t use the Veto on the morning of July 25th, it still gave hope to the houseguests for a second chance. Many are nervous that second chance will go to Frank. But you just never know with Big Brother. One thing we learned from Julie Chen that the houseguests don’t seem to know is that, “The Secret Room will only be in play for four weeks,” so they could possibly make decisions based on a power that has already passed its expiration date during their future game play. We’ll keep you posted with the latest here on Fetchland.com as well as via our twitter @Ruining BB18.

– Katherine Recap

There are two different experiences, both called “Big Brother”.

One is the television show Big Brother, as the CBS producers present it to broadcast tv audiences, three times per week. But the other is what is actually going on in the Big Brother house; the experience of the house guests, unfiltered — or at least less filtered — by television editors.

Fetchland presents Ruining Big Brother. It’s less “spoiling” Big Brother and more pulling back the curtain, to ruin our collective illusions about reality television. Enjoy! Or better yet, recoil in horror…

Daily BB House Stats:
HOH – James
HOH Nominated – Frank and Bridgette
Veto Winner – Michelle
Evicted – #1 Jozea #2 Victor #3 Bronte #4 Tiffany
Battle Back Winner – Victor
Have-Nots – TBD – none yet

As the show begins we see Victor enter the hornets nest to Frank up his butt looking for a brand new BFF. Hey. we get it Frank. Bridgette’s vice gets mad annoying after awhile but try being a little less obvious about it, geez.  Paul and Paulie also have a pow wow to discuss next steps with their “new recruit” one can only assume they’re taking the clippers to Victor’s hair this week given the way things are going. Now that Paulie’s growing a beard, when he stands next to Paul in his new wacko haircut it looks like they’re bringing the twins twist back this season, especially in their matching black tank tops. They’re obsessing about how Frank clings to Victor and plan on how they can get Frank out before him. It’s a win win for Paul most of all because Victor’s his bud from the days of yore, established trust and all.

The show brings us to the HOH competition next and Big Brother uses that same step from the last challenge Victor and Tiffany competed in for their Battle Back challenge. It’s an electric dance party endurance challenge. Paul gets out first, then Nicole until everybody else falls off one by one except for Bridgette, Mama Day, and James. When it gets to about the five hour point in the challenge, James loudly offers to make some deals. Natalie calls out that she’ll kiss him on the lips if he wins, which is lovely but not what he meant, of course.

Meanwhile down at the end of the line, Frank tries to make a deal with Day so he can allow Bridgette to get down from the challenge. She’s struggling and for some reason Frank always plays the role of her protector. He confides to Mama Day that the reason he doesn’t want her to win HOH is because someone told him that if Day won HOH she’d put him up on the block and that she wants him out before Victor. She says if he tells her who told him that she’ll take her arm down and give HOH to James. Then, in a classic moment of BB “throwing someone under the bus,” Frank tells her it was Nicole. Day takes a moment to collect Herself then calls Nicole out right in front of everyone before she and Bridgette give it to James. Natalie then gives him the promised kiss. It’s a pissfest in the BB house. Nicole is pissed at Frank, Day is pissed at Nicole, and Victor is just thrilled to have all the household attention directed away from him. Da’vonne lies to Nicole and claims to believe her that she never actually told Frank what Mama Day said. Nicole somehow knows Day’s lying and doesn’t believe her. She tells Corey that Day “played it off”. This was Frank’s last chance with Nicole, she says she’ll never trust him again. Thus, he’s made Nicole’s permanent motherfricker list.

Paul then fills Victor in all the info he missed out on. He finds out the house is after Frank and Bridgette and all he has to do is lay low to stay safe for two weeks. Victor’s happy and says maybe getting evicted was the best thing that could’ve happened to him. It kept him safe AND he got a cool belt out of it too. Originally James plans to keep his deal with Bridgette to keep her off the block this week. Then most of the house tells him if Bridgette plays Veto she could win it and take off Frank. That would make both of them safe for yet another week. James gets pressure from all sides on this point. The only exception is Natalie who reminds him several time that this is HIS HOH. She’s being a fantastic BB girlfirend and we hope Natalie writes a BB Showmance Guidebook once she’s out of the house because it would be a fun, sparkly, and informative read.  The rest of the house, other than Frank and Bridgette,  approach James with the same instincts and desires all wanting Frank and Bridgette out of the house pronto and totally forgetting Victor the competition BEAST in his cute bunny hat. So, in the end, people-pleaser James nominates Frank and Bridgette.

The feeds for July 24th mainly revolve around Frank fighting to get himself off the block. He talks Michelle’s ears off trying to get her to use the Veto on him and also wanders the house seemingly searching for something. This, of course, gets the feedsters all riled up hoping Frank’s going to find The Secret Room. We shall see. It could just be his way of pacing and thinking. Either way, we’ll keep you posted at Fetchland.com on all the latest in the Big Brother house with daily updates and tweets from @RuiningBB18.

– Katherine Recap